Thursday, September 11, 2008

Letter to Self

Dear Angie,

It seems a little strange to see you, my younger self. Writing to you is every bit as strange, yet a gift all the same. Here goes.

I know that criticism is hard for you take, it hasn't changed much in the last twenty years, except perhaps I/we do it with more grace? I hope that you don't take any part of this letter in anyway except in the way it was intended. With love.

It's been enlightening to see that many things have not changed in twenty years. We still have many of the same habits and routines. It is true that we are creatures of habit. Some things are just so ingrained in our being that time doesn't alter them. We still make the bed right when we wake up. Still unload the dishwasher and start the laundry first thing. Still hate wearing socks, and still have cracked and bleeding feet. Still wake up throughout the night wondering if they kids are OK or thinking about the ways in which you failed that day. Sound familiar? Need I go on?

Emotionally, we have evolved. We are stronger now. More empathetic. We have more experiences under our belt and have learned to deal with them in more positive ways. We are much more comfortable with who we are and are able to more fully focus on our goals. We are still working on patience. Perhaps that will always be a work in progress.

Physically, aging isn't as terrible as you thought it would be. Being able to do all the things that I need to is the blessing that my body has given me. I wish we hadn't always taken advantage of that fact. Just so you know, those wrinkles you are worried about are inconsequential, and going grey is not the worst thing in the world to happen, although why you are thinking about it now is beyond me.

I know that you want some ready answers, but I can't give them to you. I really feel that that would be a disservice to you. But, I would urge you to ponder more fully ways that you can be a better mother, better wife and better friend and relative. Perfection isn't important. Doing the best you can is. You know who you can turn to for help and answers. Always remember that.

I know that you want to know about our children. I won't reveal anything more than you know, which I know makes you crazy. You always did desire a magic ball. I can't give you that, but I can give you this: advice from older me to younger you.

I hope that you spend more time being introspective, more spiritual, more healthy. Better.

In 20 years we'll compare notes.

Your older, better, self.
Angie



To read more letters to self, or the answers to other prompts, visit Mama's Losin' It.

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41 comments:

Mamarazzi said...

oh YES YES YES!!

i think i need to wrote myself a letter too!!

this was awesome. congrarts on all the self reflection, impressive and inspiring!

Cecilia said...

How inspiring! Thanks for sharing :)

Mamarazzi said...

umm that's wrIte...sheesh. it's almost 2am. perhaps i should go to bed.

g'night!

oh and congrats!! (not congrarts)

where the heck is spell check on these comment boxes!

Robin said...

What a wonderful letter. It's amazing to me how inconsequential so much of what I worried about turned out to be. Oh, and the going gray thing? That's why god invented hair dye :-).

mannequin said...

hmm... Something I hadn't thought too much about so thanks Angie.
We spend a lot of time listening to others and we often judge ourselves according to what others think.
In the end, at the end of the day, in the middle of the night, it's what WE think, what WE feel that matters. We have the voice inside us that we always take with us.

Thanks Angie and P.S.
I do the same, the waking in the night from the sound of my own inner voice.
I just can't stop talking!

Tash said...

yes it is crazy thinking back. Patience is something I am working on too. My 20th will be coming up this year and I have realized that there are just habits that get harder and harder to break as the decades go by. Great post.

Darla said...

Wow, great post. Makes a person really think, you know? Makes you realize that in 20 years (which WILL come, eventually, and a lot faster than any of us can imagine) we WILL occasionally reflect back the last 20 yrs (or 10, 15, etc.). Hopefully we can be okay with what we see. The only way we can be is think a little about it now...what do we really want to be able to look back on?

Shannon said...

What a great idea, that was awesome!

Melissa said...

Nice letter. 20 years experience sure does make a difference, huh?

Melanie said...

You know there is something good about getting older...WiSer (note to self-wink). Thanks for the letter.

oº˚ Anissa ˚ºo said...

Tiffany sent me -- and I think You are pretty, smart, generous, and funny. Love your blog! Much Love

oº˚ Anissa ˚ºo said...

Tiffany sent me -- and I think You are pretty, smart, generous, and funny. Love your blog! Much Love

mommaof4wife2r said...

maybe now that we r older, people will listen! yea!

Mama's Losin' It said...

Laundry and dishes first thing in the morning...great idea! This was a really sweet letter to yourself.

I'm so glad you could participate in the workshop this week. I'll be posting my wordful Wednesday later this afternoon too!

(time permitting ;))

Melissa the Careful Wisher said...

Wow! Very well done! Great idea! Melissa

Mama Dawg said...

I've read you before, but I have to say that I loved this post.

Tiaras & Tantrums said...

love it!!
So sweet!!

Jacki said...

I loved reading this, because it is so true! 10 years ago I was all worried about turning 30, and now that I am 31 I am wondering what I was so worried about. I look back and think about how stupid I was at 21 and am so glad I've grown up.

sassy stephanie said...

Wow, great letter Angie. You are a great writer with so much heart.

latree said...

write a letter to myself? I might have to try once.
it's amazing how in 20 years you still have so many things in common.

well i have one for sure: stubborn :D

Cecily R said...

See, that kind of introspection scares me a little. I don't think my 20 year letter would be NEAR as cool as yours. Sigh...

Melissa said...

That's awesome. I just found a letter to myself that I wrote when I was 18 when we were packing up for Moscow. I wrote one to me and to my future husband.
It was fun.
I never did show Dru his one.

Mark and Kiss said...

It really makes me want to listen to the older people even more. It totally makes sense the 'smile' and 'look' I would see my parents give each other when I thought "I knew it all" in my younger days.... I hope that I have the same love and patience when my kids hit their teens and young twenties. :)

CanCan said...

I had a boss my first year of college that made me write a letter to myself. He mailed it to me one year later. It was enlightening.

christie said...

Beautiful letter!

Live.Love.Eat said...

You should be proud of yourself or yourself should be proud of you....ok now I'm confused. You should be proud !!! :)

Tiffany said...

Great letter. What a gift that would be.

david mcmahon said...

G'day from Australia,

As we evolve, we learn. That's the beauty of life.

(Came here from Scrappy Sue - and I'm glad I did!)

Blog Stalker said...

I love it! If only we could really write ourselves letters that we could then somehow, someway send them back in time. I still don't know if I would listen to myself, but I would like to think I would.

Shanan said...

Angie, Your blog rocks! Thanks for sharing the inspiring letter!

Kristin said...

Hmmmm, interesting. I don't think my 'younger' self would listen though. You know how silly 20 year olds seem now? I just thought I knew it all then, only now am I starting to realize that I WAS a silly 20 year old. Oh, you meant 13 year old you?

AVT Coach said...

You are one of my favorite bloggers and this proves it. You have so much depth and I loved your letter. You really embody abundant living to its fullest and you deserve all of the accolades that these women shower on you!
You inspire others every day! Remember that on a down day and re-read your Letter to Self!

Laura said...

I loved this letter. I learned more about you too.

There is a phrase President Hinkley often used, "Stand a little taller" which to me made me feel better about striving in small ways to be better instead of striving only for a perfection I would never meet.

Anyway, its a great concept.

I need to make my bed when I wake up and start laundry first thing.

Jamie @ Purposeful Pursuit said...

Love it! So inspiring!

RiverPoet said...

It would be kind of like the Butterfly Effect to tell your younger self what to do, wouldn't it? If I could speak to my younger self, I would just send her a very long, drawn-out hug that she would feel in every bone in her body. She needed it and deserved it.

Peace - D
(found you through David)

Gunnisac Sandersons said...

very cute Angie, good luck on your goals and have fun with your older self.

Daryl said...

Over from David's ...

Gosh I sure hope you listen to you .. but I suspect you won't .. my younger never listens .... sigh


:-Daryl

Stephanie said...

You never cease to amaze me! Very creative. I love it! I should give this a go for a scrapbook I'm going to do for turning the big 4.0. Mine would never be this creative though :)

MoziEsmé said...

Great post! Why are we always so wise 20 years after the fact?

I'm contemplating writing a letter to myself 20 years in the future now - thanks for the idea!

Carrie and Troy Keiser said...

If only we could really enlighten our younger selves!

Good N Crazy said...

I missed this? You are totally upbeat girl...I'd be all negative on a post like this...

more spiritual, more healthy...Go Girl.